Archive for February, 2006

Things You Don’t Want To Hear In The Gym Locker Room

Voice 1: I’m just gonna grab my junk here and run.
Voice 2: That’s something I’d like to see…

Read more

I Wouldn’t Expect You To Understand, Feeble Vertebrate. An Earwig’s Ways Are Cryptical

Let me tell you something. Let me tell you something about EPIC storms. Let me tell you about convertible tops that have been slashed open. Let me try to explain that the magnitude of this storm’s force was greater than a Hefty bag’s ability to keep afore mentioned slashed opening properly protected. Let me tell you that some dwelling spaces are not as water tight as a brother might lead a sister to believe. Let me tell you that if CiCi and I never have to bail water out of anything ever again for all eternity we will be content that we were not cheated in this existence.
If you’ve never tried Orthodoxy, I would highly recommend it. Especially if you’re fed up with wimpy religion and I can say this with utmost confidence: Orthodox Christianity is not for the weak of stamina, fortitude or will. Due to scheduling constraints we left after two hours, but the Mass was still going strong. I admit I felt a little defeated, but I took some condolence in that the kindly lady who guided us (thanks to Cici) lasted only thirty minutes her first time, or so she said. On the other hand I felt like I had WORSHIPPED the Lord and I have the aching body and sore calves to prove it.
It probably goes without saying, but growing up Baptist does not prepare one for an Orthodox service. The simple fact of entering the cathedral and seeing no pews was a big enough shock. The whole experience was overwhelming to the point where my audio, and visual perception just kind of went numb and let the tides of ancient religious ritual wash over. The murals, the incense, the crossing, the bowing, the icons, the priest’s outfits and the standing in one spot for two hours were like a tidal wave. I couldn’t help but be a willing captive to this monumental spiritual menagerie, my abilities to resist, my defenses were too beleaguered. A kind of stupor?
I highly recommend it. I also highly recommend keeping a sturdy tarp and bungies available, as well as, mops, buckets and sponges. For, you know, catastrophic flooding.

Read more

They Might Be Talking About Me

I’ve always had a lingering interest in learning foreign languages. I took a few years of Spanish in High School with very marginal results. There are a myriad of reasons and excuses as to why that was, but in the end it simply means that I never even became even close to functional with the language. Over the years I’ve considered picking it back up, trying build upon the small foundation that I already have, but without any real reason to do so I’ve always let the idea drop. Lately however, that purpose that I’ve always lacked has been replaced by a need. You might even call in a yearning.
To that end I began using the Internet to research how best I might fulfill this need, or if falling short of best, at least how I might do it freely. Now, when I want to do something free of charge I still want to use the best available product, and we all know that the Internet is good for fulfillment of all sorts of yearnings. But sometimes you have to compromise with what is most popular or effective and what is actually available for burglary. Fortunately it would seem that The Rosetta Stone: Spanish is both very popular, at least amongst Amazon folk, and quite available via certain nefarious channels.
So far I’ve managed a copy that proclaims multiple language lessons, but it seems pretty dated. I have another version, currently percolating, that’s labeled as exclusively Spanish, so I’m hoping it may be wielding a more modern interface. Either way I feel like I’ve made some head way into my project and I’m pretty excited about getting this crap home and giving it a whirl. Because as enthusiastic as I may be to start expanding my language barriers I just can’t bring myself to enunciate “El Gato” or “La Mujera” while at work.
My hope is that the combination of being exposed to native speakers and using a more formal learning tool I might actually be able to climb this hill and become bilingual. Then all I have to do is sit back and wait for the monies to start rolling in.

Return top

INFORMATION

Change this sentence and title from admin Theme option page.